That’s What White Folks Do

When we moved to Vermont and started our collection of animals, my husband erected a fence that wasn't what I had in mind. For the entry way, he used an old door. I was so embarrassed. 

When one of the many folks who have come to offer technical assistance thought it was interesting and creative, I replied… it’s so ghetto. Ghetto is a term I never would have thought applied to me….  She told me living in mountains of Vermont, with animals, we weren't “ghetto”. We were now included in the “hick”category. I don’t know about stereotypes or the word “hick”. There are so many negative stereotypes about Blacks and other people of color. But I kind of liked that fact that we were being included instead of excluded. Something to ponder.

Regarding stereotypes: my husband has a new term: “That’s What White Folks Do”. He’s applied it to several things recently.

I was reading an article about water waste and was horrified by how much water we used just flushing the toilet. Depending on the size of the tank, it takes up to 7 gallons of water when you flush. While we are looking into water saving toilets, I had a thought on how we could conserve water.  Heard of the saying “When it’s yellow let it mellow, if it’s brown, flush it down?” Well I decided that I was going to flush ever 

other time it was yellow. I only do it in the upstairs bathroom, but my husband was horrified. Every time he goes in after I’ve been in there, I’ve heard him yell “that’s disgusting”. I don’t know why it bothers him. He pees in the front yard, off the deck, behind the garage. Anyway, when I explained my rationale, his response was “That’s what white folks do.” Doesn’t matter, I’m doing it now in protest of every disgusting thing he’s ever done! And there’s a lot.

We were offered an opportunity to acquire two male alpacas. Mark was in charge of getting the trailer to transport them from their old home to our new home. It was about 30 miles each way. We agreed to take them on a particular day. Well guess what, Mark didn’t take care of the trailer and wanted to postpone the transport. Postponing wasn’t an option. Since we don’t have a cover on our truck, I decided we could take out the seat in the back of my Jeep and transport them that way. I put down a tarp, and hay over the tarp and thought it was a perfect solution. I’d seen alpacas transported in the back of a Subaru, so why not? Again, my husband was horrified. We engaged in a minor verbal altercation before he yelled “that’s what white folks do.” I did it anyway. And you know what, it worked!

As an activity and fundraiser at the school where I teach, we hosted a Cow Plop. I asked one of the students about it. Basically, you plot out a grid on the ground (grass, concrete, asphalt, whatever) and everyone buys a square. Then you bring in a cow and if it “plops” in your square, you win money. I told my student “that’s disgusting”. She said it was disgusting. It was her cow they used. She said at first it wouldn’t go, then once it started going, it wouldn’t stop. When I told Mark about it he replied (all together now) “That’s what white folks do”.